"No Way!"

The Forenz Family Adoption Story

With six beautiful children by the miracles of both birth and adoption, we felt our family was complete. But in 2008, we started to feel a persistent but gentle nudge from God to adopt again. After a lot of prayer and soul searching, we decided on the country of Ethiopia. We were planning on adopting one child, maybe two, under age 6. My husband John and I were in total agreement that we did not feel like we were supposed to adopt an infant, which is strange, since I always thought I would want more babies. We had absolutely no intention of adopting a much older child/children.

For some reason I couldn't resist looking at the photo listing. Seven pages of children... probably 50-60 children total in the listing. It broke my heart to see these children, some with hopeful smiling faces, some shy, some sullen, some sad and withdrawn, all older or part of a sibling group. Then three little girls caught my eye – ages 3, 10 and 13. I instantly thought, "No way, they are too old, there are three of them! I can't handle three more. They probably have background issues, and they don't know English! No way!" I closed the page and walked away. Later, my daughter Sarah, who is 15, said, "Mom, did you see the three girls on page six?" She gave me a knowing smile as I again muttered, "No way" and continued cooking dinner.

Later Sarah showed the list to her Dad, and without prompting or knowing who we had looked at, he took notice of the same three girls. We talked about it later. Sarah was bubbly and excited saying, "These are our girls!!" I was irritable and angry. I didn't want to discuss it. Three were too many; they were too old! John in his infinite wisdom kept quiet.

That night I couldn't sleep; I prayed on and off all night long. I kept telling God all the reasons why I couldn't do this, but I think He was just smiling at me with that same knowing look Sarah had earlier. The next morning John tentatively suggested that maybe I should call CWA and ask about the girls. For some reason I agreed, although I was still thinking, "No way, they are too old, there are too many."

We received very limited information and a few photos. I looked at the girls and voiced out loud what I had been thinking, "No way!"

Then, we received a short video clip of the middle and youngest child, and something changed. I was mesmerized. They were breathtaking. I looked past their age and the fact that there were three, that they didn't know English, and the fact that they could have background issues, and saw little girls who needed a mom. I knew they were mine! John and I prayed, contacted CWA to proceed, and we were filled with a total sense of peace. All of our fears vanished.

We had no money to start the adoption, but over the next ten months we watched in amazement as God provided every penny we needed through grants and the gifts of friends and family.

Again my old fears of adopting three older children came back in full force. We had very limited information about their personalities. My biggest fear was adopting a teenager. I worried that she would resent us for taking her away from her country and culture. I worried that she would be so independent that she wouldn’t want a mom and dad. I worried that she wouldn’t want to come with us. I began to worry that we were getting in way over our heads. As our departure date drew near, God began to replace my fears with an eager anticipation to meet the girls.

When we arrived at the CWA care center in Ethiopia, John barely stepped out of the van when he felt Mahelet (13) throw herself into his arms. The reception we received from the girls was nothing short of a miracle. Nothing could have prepared us for how sweet and affectionate they were. They had apparently been driving the staff crazy asking when we would come.

We have now been home for one month. Every new experience has been seen as a hilarious adventure and met with squeals and giggles. We have watched with enjoyment as new relationships have been forged between all of our children, and the girl’s transition into our family has been truly amazing.

With children who are ages 15 down to 21 months, we get a lot of comments, and people think we’re crazy. Life with nine children is wonderful, overwhelming, exhausting, and exhilarating all rolled into one. We may be crazy, but we are so glad that when we heard God’s call, we listened and said yes. The easy thing would have been to ignore it, but just think of all the blessings we would have missed!

Is God calling you?

John & Elizabeth Forenz